Wednesday, December 31, 2008

I Can't Take It Anymore

Okay, I'm done. I've never been good at keeping secrets. I just have to get this off my chest, and I figured this is the best way to do it.

You knew that Matt Moore was taking a little "vacation" away from the blog. Something to do with a real-life relocation or something. That's not...entirely true. He was relocating, sure. Constantly. The man flew all over the world, visiting spiritual leaders, prophets, guidance counselors, cult leaders, the set of Crossing Over with John Edwards, psychics, and scholars of the supernatural, with just one goal in mind: put a hex on the Jazz. That's right Jazz fans -- we've had it in for you all along.

While I never questioned Matt's resolve to quash all of those who dare challenge HP's unquestionable rule (or really, hyperbolic hatred of the Jazz), I have to admit that I had my doubts as to his methods. I mean, I'm as COMPLETELY-unbiased-and-yet-still-irritated-by-Carlos-Boozer as they come, but hexes? Well, I'm manning up and admitting that I was wrong. 30 days of globe trotting and hexing has reaped a hobbled Deron Williams, injury complications for Boozer, frequent absences for Memo Okur, an on-the-job accident for Paul Millsap, and the latest: Carlos Boozer suddenly deciding to have arthroscopic knee surgery. Mental note to not get on his bad side.

Other than trying their best to stay out of Moore's cross hairs, the Jazz will have a lot of work to do. If there is a team in the league that needs home court advantage in the playoffs, it's the Jazz. Their road record (7-10) rivals the Clippers (5-10) and the Bucks (7-12), and though they certainly are excused for that due to their ridiculous string of hex-caused freak incidents, history serves as a reminder that this team excels at home and struggles to maintain that same high level of play on the road. Take away from that what you will, but this team needs to win every regular season game it can not only to secure home-court in the playoffs (optimistically), but to even make the playoffs. The Suns are trotting along, the Mavs are surging, and the Nuggets refuse to vanish without a trace. Things are going to be ugly for the odd team out come April. If Boozer's injury struggles persist (or if he his return doesn't go as swiftly or smoothly as planned) or if the team hits the rough patch, who's to say everyone's favorite regular season team won't be such a great regular season team after all?

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