Thursday, October 23, 2008

Be Careful What You Wish For...It May Be More Awesome Than You Could Possibly Imagine


October 31, 2007 -- 12:53 AM

Derrick Rose stood alone in the gym, long after all his teammates and coaches had left. But, as he practiced his free throws (of course!) on the dimly lit hardwood, a strange, ghastly visage appeared before him.

"DERRICK ROOOOOOOOSE!"

"What the hell?!" Derrick was understandably startled, and afraid.

"DO NOT BE AFRAAAAAID DERRICKKKKK! I AM THE GHOST OF LORENZEN WRIIIIIGHT, THE SPIRIT OF BASKETBALL WOOORK ETHICCCC! TO REWARD YOU FOR YOUR LATE NIGHT TOILS ON THESE MEMPHIS FLOOOOORS, I WILL GRANT YOU THREE WISHES."

Derrick was hesitant. "Wait, you for serious? ...and isn't Lorenzen Wright still alive?"

"...Well, yeah. Small technicality. BUT CHOOOOOSE WISELY, YOUNG ROSE...WHAT DOES YOUR HEART TRULY DESIIIIIRE?"

Derrick pondered the thought. What did his heart truly desire? Money? Wealth? Power? "Hmm...OK, I've got my first wish. Lorenzen, I want to lead the Tigers to the national championship, and then, with the game on the line, I wanna ma--oh man! I want to be the number one overall pick in the NBA draft!"

"AS YOU WISH, MASTER ROSE."

And with that, the ghost of Lorenzen Wright disappeared into the darkness. Rose never spoke of this moment to anyone. Even if he had, who would believe him? It was his gift...and his curse.

Five months later, Rose had just experienced a night from hell. The Memphis Tigers had blown a lead in the NCAA Championship game after having numerous chances to seal the win from the free throw line. Rose was furious; not only at himself, his teammates, and the basketball gods. Above all, Rose was furious with his familiar, the spirit who had promised him victory oh so many months ago.

"LORENZEN! Where the hell are you?!"

Lorenzen had materialized from nothing, conjured from the spirit world at the beckon of Derrick Rose alone.

"YOU WRAAAAAAAANG?"

"Lorenzen, you said you'd grant my damn wishes! We got to the frickin' title game, and blew it! You TOLD ME tha-"

"MASTER ROOOOSE, YOU ONLY WISHED TO LEAD YOUR TEAM TO THE GAME AND TO BE DRAFTED FIRST OVERAAAAALLL. THERE WAS NO CONDITION THAT YOU ACTUALLY HAD TO WIIIIIIIN! BAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Rose stood in disbelief. "Ahh, sh*t. So that's how it's gonna be. Well you know what, I've got my next wish, and this time it's foolproof. Once I get into the NBA, I want to have a big, career night almost immediately. And I want it against a good team too! A playoff team, man! I wanna lead my team against impossible odds, come back from a huge deficit, and then nail the game-winner. GAME-WINNER. You got that, Lorenzen?"

"AS YOU WISH, MASTER ROSE."

And with that, the Ghost of Lorenzen Wright disappeared once again, smirking, plotting.



October 21, 2008 -- 11:48 PM

After a long night's work, Rose sat in the locker room with only his thoughts to accompany him. The game had come and gone, the camaraderie had come and gone, and the rest of the team and staff had departed for the night. It was only Rose, the empty lockers of the victors, and the red and black. Some players tend to enjoy the peripherals of basketball and fame. Rose enjoyed the silence.

The Ghost of Lorenzen Wright saw an end to that.

"DERRRRRICKKKKKK!"

"HOLY-...oh, it's you Lorenzen. Damn, you scared the sh*t out of me. Whaddyou want?"

"I'M HERE TO GRANT YOUR THIRD WIIIIIISH!"

"Oh, well...wait, third wish? You still haven't granted my -- Lorenzen, you bastard. Tell me that you haven't granted my second wish already."

"BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"DUDE. That was a preseason game! And against the Mavs?! I was thinking Spurs, or Celtics, or Hornets, or...dammit Lorenzen, you are really screwing me here."

"..........BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"You know what, I'll make my third wish. Just so I never have to see your ugly mug again. Okay, Lorenzen, all I want is to play over 30 minutes a game my rookie year. That's all I want. That's not complicated right? There's no strings attached to that, right? Even YOU couldn't screw this one up...RIGHT?!"

"AS YOU WISH, MASTER ROSE."

And with that, the Ghost of Lorenzen Wright vanished forever.



October 22, 2008 -- 10: 23 PM

Derrick Rose's career was off to a fast start. Preseason success seemed but a stepping stone to the great things to come. But in the third quarter of a preseason contest against the Minnesota Timberwolves, a shocking occurence caught Rose's attention.

Larry Hughes dove for a loose ball as Rose watched on. But Hughes collided with an opponent, and following the play he lay crumpled on the floor. Writhing. Grimacing. In tremendous pain. Roses' initial reaction was grief for his fallen comrade; the red he donned was stained, burned into cloth by wearing his heart on his jersey.

But then Rose's eyes opened wide. "Well, Derrick," Rose said to himself, under his breath, "it looks like our guard rotation just had an unexpected opening."

The Ghost of Lorenzen Wright had finally delivered. Little did Derrick know that with Hughes' injury and Rose's increased minutes, Lorenzen Wright had practically fulfilled two wishes when Rose had but one.

 
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