Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Ball Movements 3.25.08

Reasons To Watch the Games Of The NBA Tonight:

March 25th, 2008 AD (AfterDirkilous):
The Clip are in the big D tonight to face the Mavs who are without their big D for the next two weeks. The Mavericks officially have zero room for error. They can't go .500. They can't go .600. They need to win 75% of their games in order to keep pace and kick the Nuggets off their back. You want reasons to watch this game? You've got Jason Terry, Josh Howard, and Jerry Stackhouse with their backs to the wall against an inferior opponent. For the Clip, I keep wanting Brand to randomly just show up. How great would that be? If without warning, without hype, without any indication, Brand just got announced in the starting lineups and started. How awesome would that be? Sadly, it won't be happening, and Al Thornton will need to score umpteen bajillion points tonight in order to only lose by a dozen. Unless the Mavs have completely folded... LA Clippers at Dallas, 8:30PM EST.




I May Be Eighth, But I'm Not A Dweeb: Atlanta is at Chicago for a battle of "Who's going to shoot themselves out of a chance to get annihilated by Boston?!" . This rejection has got Chicago so low, they're currently in 11th place, three back of the 8th seed. Atlanta on the other hand, guesses it should stick up for itself, but they really think it's better this way. The more you suffer, the more it shows you really care. Right? Yeahhhh. Joe Johnson versus Thabo! Come get your tickets now! Atlanta at Chicago, 8:30PM EST.


That Ain't Magic, That's Good Old Fashioned Spurs Ball: Spurs are in Orlando. Dwight Howard can posterize Oberto all he wants. Tim Duncan will still score 15 and Manu will do his thing. If Orlando's going to have a prayer tonight, Hedo's going to need to threekkake them into the cold, cold ground. San Antonio has won three straight, and I fully expect them to start killing people left and right again, just to prove a point. How many times are they going to have to rise from the dead just to show people that you cannot stop the Golem? San Antonio at Orlando, 7pm EST.

There But For The Grace Of Danny Walsh Goes Larry Bird: That'll be all, Danny. 'Preciate the hard work, but it's Jesus' show, now. Who wants to trade for role players?! New Orleans is in Indiana tonight to eradicate the White-Out Lovefest. I'm actually kind of interested to see Dunleavy and Diener against Peja and Bowen. That's just high comedy right there. Oh, yeah, and I'd pay money to watch Chris Paul do anything. He could be buying tampons for his mom. That's fine. New Orleans at Indiana, 7PM EST.

What Do The Utah Jazz And Jean Paul Sartre Have In Common?: They're both existentialist. And full of pasty white goodness. What I mean by the existentialist comment is that both of them seem to derive their own meaning from existence. They're not concerned with any sort of formulaic plan or identity, they simply exist and seek to derive some sort of fulfillment from that. They should get plenty of fulfillment tonight when the porous Bobcats defense comes strolling on into the SLC. Wallace is back up to snuff, but Deron-Run-Run has to be pissed about that Lakers loss. Hide the women and Kantian influenced children! Charlotte at Utah, 9PM EST.

The Waiting Game: Portland is waiting for next year when they get Greg Oden back. Washington is waiting till the get Gil back. They should just paint a stopwatch on the court as the logo. Anyway, Jamison versus Aldridge, Butler versus Outlaw, and LockSmith versus Roy should make for some damn fine ball. And if Gilbert suddenly plays...whoo... Washington at Porltand, 10PM EST.

 
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