Monday, February 11, 2008

8 Footer 2.11.08

Had the 15 ready to go, and then Firefox crashed. I suspect the Church of Scientology, after I watched too many Anonymous videos today. Shortened one today, lads, and lasses, only 8. Back to full run tomorrow, and some other surprises.

15 Reasons To Watch The Games Of The NBA Tonight:

1. Act IV, In Which Mighty Mouse Returns To The Scene Of The Crime: Don't expect a KG-like welcome for Stoudamire tonight, but Damon does return to his roots as the Spurs visit Toronto. It should be a close game, and by "close game" I mean, "the Spurs beat the hell out of them because they don't like losing to Boston."

2. Let's Not Forget Who Really Started This Trade Avalanche (Via the Corndogg): And that would be one Michael Jeffrey Jordan. Yes, the greatest person ever to ever to anything ever related to sports got this whole ball a'rolling when he made the savvy move to send Walter "Fabio" Hermann and Primo "Who Wants to Sex Primo" Brezec to Detroit for Nazr Mohammed, whose name in Swahili means "The Man of Many Pump Fakes and Few Dunks." Weird, you never think those languages translate easily, but they do. So, just to get it clear, Jordan was a step ahead the entire time. So, when Gasol-ina comes burning up the nets in Charlotte tonight, all 28 fans there can get mad at Jordan, cause it's his fault.

3. HP Contest Time (Via the Corndogg): If anyone out there, without any research, can name up all 10 of the probable starters tonight for the Clips at Bucks, you will win a very special prize. That prize... a virtual bitch-slap in your email, because you really need to do something better with you life than remember information about the Clips and Bucks. Like write about it and make fun of others, like we do.

4. No Rest For The Weary (Via The Corndogg): What a cruel 1-2 punch by the NBA scheduling department (whom we have questioned before). The Wizz and their "Rookie Tour" get the second night of the back-to-backs at Golden State, right after losing to the fun n gun Suns last night. This is not the way to maintain any semblance of health on your team, which it already lacks to begin with. God Speed, good sirs.

5. Jedi Mind Trick (Via the Corndogg): No way Houston loses tonight. They are rolling and playing great right now. Portland doesn't have a shot. Dream Shake is all knowing.

6. Trillion Watch: Chuck Hayes. Brandan Wright. Tyronn Lue.

7. Random Wikipedia Analogy of the Day (Via The Random Article Link; No Cheating): Have you ever really seen the Warriors run the break? I mean, truly seen it? Davis pressing forward, sizing up every player...Jackson on the wing, ready to drive or shoot... Ellis always looking for the fast bucket... It's a work of art. It's so pretty, in fact, that it belongs in the Queensland Gallery of Modern Art.

8. Revenge Of VNuv Part II: Charlie Villanueva was complaining about not getting playing time. Then Yi went down. He got playing time. He scored 16 points and nabbed 16 boards. The Bucks lost to the Knicks. Something very similar will happen tonight. The end.

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