Monday, January 28, 2008

Blogger MVP/ROY Poll

Jeremy's got the new Blogger MVP/ROY Results over at Pick Axe and Roll.

Check them out here.

Here's our ballot. The system works on a point scale, so 10 is the most points given (our #1 is Chris Paul, for example), and 1 is the fewest.

Thanks to Jeremy for doing a great job with the rankings.

10. Chris Paul: What more can you say about the kid? Oh, how about the fact that the friggin' Hornets are tops in the West? Without a home-court advantage? This is just ridiculous. We're ready to announce Chris Paul our new Hornet overlord.
9. Steve Nash: Nash, apparently, has had enough of our cute little mockery. Teams are still trying that "make Nash the scorer" thing. He's still leading in assists, pulling in more than last year, and he's averaging 20.2 ppg in the last 5. He's also leading a team that's (at the time of this writing) tied for 1st place in the West, and that's with missing their starting small forward, Grant Hill. We iz afearz of Steviez Nashnezz.
8. LeBron James: Uh-oh. Somebody woke up James. He's actually slipped in our rankings, but now his whole team is (gulp) playing well. There is absolutely no one more terrifying if you're a fan of the other team in a close game inside the last five minutes. Nobody. Not Garnett. Not Billups. Not Kobe. Nobody. Yeah, we said it. You gonna tell the King we're wrong? Didn't think so.
7. Dwight Howard- We still swoon over the big lug, but the feisty point guards and his Witnessessess have outperformed Big Baby Jesus as of late. Still, as ardent supporters of the kid, we think a big second half of the season from him (and maybe some defensive rotation) could get him back on the map.
6. Kevin Garnett- "Hola, soy El Tigre Monstruoso. Usted me temerĂ¡. Entonces usted morirĂ¡." By the way, in case you haven't noticed, he plays for the Celtics. I don't know if you caught that, with him popping the jersey after that DOMINATING win over the vaunted last-place Wolves. El Tigre loses points for douchebaginess.
5. Kobe Bryant- We were all ready to crown Kobe as the once and future King, finally. Then Bynum got hurt, and here came a perfect opportunity for us to fairly criticize Kobe in the context of the MVP competition. And lo, the devil did return to his brain, and he did shoot way too much, and the villagers all cried "Thank you, Lord. Thank you, Lord."
4. Caron Butler- We keep trying to figure out inventive logic systems to put Caron no.1 That's how much we like what Tuff Juice is doing up in DC. Unfortunately, he's only human. And humans, apparently, get the crap kicked out of them by LeBron James and Ziggy Ilgauskas.
3. Brandon Roy- We can already start to see the steam start to escape from the edges of the upstart Blazers, but that shouldn't detract from the magnificent job this kid has done. Took over a rebuilding situation without the key rebuilding piece and leads them to the top of the division. Leadership, skill, and passion.
2. Chauncey Billups- Everyone does realize this guy is the Tom Petty of the NBA, right? Sold out concerts, top selling singles and albums, consistent playmaker. Never, ever going to get the credit he deserves.
1. Yao Ming-
Matt: Corn, we need one more for the Blogger MVP Rankings.
Corn: Put Billups on there.
Matt: We already have him on there.
Corn: Well put Roy in.
Matt: Already on there.
Corn: Well I don't know who else, man! I mean, Duncan is in cruise control, Wade's team looks like something I cra...
Matt: I've got it! We'll plug in the 7 foot chinese guy! He's always a reasonable choice!
Corn: Success!

5. Kevin Durant- At this point we're pulling for literally every other rookie to overtake him because of how crappy his shooting percentage is. Unfortunately, the players that were good early have hit the wall (Horford) and the players that are good now are just now getting time (Conley). So Kid Delicious stays for a while.
4. Mike Conley: If anyone, inside the city of Memphis or out, besides 3 Shades of Blue, would pay attention the Grizzlies, you'd see that this team is absurdly close to being legit. And one of the biggest reason is the huge spark Conley has brought. His speed and quickness is working great in that system. Keep an eye on Conley to make a late season push at Durant, which Durant won't be able to see due to the gigantic fortress of bricks he'll have built himself by that point.
3. Luis Scola: The numbers aren't good enough to put him any higher, but Scola is on here because we have yet to see a player this season outside of Dwayne Wade try harder for every loose ball. Scola comes in and instantly invigorates the club. We expect him to be starting come playoffs. IF the Rockets make the playoffs.
2. JCN: Again, Grizzlies=Getting Better. Navarro has been dynamite off the bench, and is plugging in double digits already. We like where he's headed, even if he does lose his snuggle-bear, Pau Gasol.
1. Al Horford- Rookie wall, meet Al. Al, meet rookie wall.

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